Tuesday, September 27, 2016
Standards are someone ELSE'S definition of YOUR success!
Kind of a crazy thought huh?
But it's true. It seems that we are our best critics. And it's almost a universal truth that we grow up being taught that we should analyze and critique our actions against "standards" which are really just the expectations of others. You see it as early as grade school when you are graded on your knowledge of subjects which eventually becomes a precursor to identifying whether you are "fit" to graduate onto the next grade.
Extrapolate this into your daily life as an adult! We tell ourselves that we aren't successful until we achieve certain accomplishments or make a certain amount of money or reach a certain social status. The idea of being worthy of certain things in life seems to always come with a caveat that certain prerequisites or "standards" are met first.
Isn't it possible that we all learn, grow and progress at different rates and in different ways depending on our experience and circumstances? Isn't it possible that your talents may not be realized yet and you don't necessarily control all of the variables to identify your true potential in life?
Of course we don't control everything that happens in our lives. But there are certain variables that we CAN control.
Did you define what is important to YOU today?
Did you illustrate your OWN vision of success so you know what exactly it is you are going after?
These are YOUR definitions NOT someone else's...so FORGET the standards and definitely FORGET the expectations of others!
There are two ways to look at improving your life:
The first is how we are conditioned as children to look at life:
You identify a weakness that is holding you back and determine that this weakness is the reason you aren't succeeding in life. You make a plan to improve upon this weakness and it gives you hope that if you can just change who you are that you'll be worthy of the life you want to live.
How has that been working for you? Do you really want to define your life by how and why you are weak?
OR there's a much healthier way:
Focus instead on who you ARE not who you AREN'T! You can concentrate instead on the talents you possess and the strengths that have come from your experience in life. Instead of focusing on the standards that other people have established to compare the lives of (frankly, very different) people, make your OWN standards! What is it that you bring to the table that makes you unique or STRONG? How can you utilize that strength to build the life that you envision for yourself?
My challenge to YOU is to focus on what you CAN control and where you excel!
It's easy to get caught up in what you think is your lot in life, what you think you need to accomplish by a certain age, by a certain standard that your friends (or frenemies) or your heroes have achieved.
But does it make you any less of a person if you don't do so?
OF COURSE NOT!!!
So GO, surprise yourself. Work toward what you want every day whether the prize is easily in view or not. Guess what, you MAY not get to what others define as "SUCCESS". In fact, your eventual realization of success may be what others SEE as failure. SO WHAT! They aren't YOU and you aren't THEM! We all live our OWN lives!
You may struggle or take longer than you expected but it NEVER makes for a wasted effort, a mistake, a wrong path or an unworthy pursuit to be the best you can be!
Just because you don't live up to someone else's standard NEVER means you are less successful, you are less talented, you are less passionate or you don't care!
You make your own success in life and your definition is your own...so DEFINE it and PURSUE it until you ACHIEVE IT!